Cornish community outraged after signpost vandalized

Residents of Pool in Cornwall are outraged after the Church Road ‘Welcome to Pool’ signpost was vandalized, with ‘AND’ graffitied after the word, ‘Pool’. There is some speculation as to how this is meant to read.

UKIP councillor and self-proclaimed exaggerator, Damien Bigot, said: “Let me make this clear, there’s no excuse for criminal damage, but the message is loud and clear. With 10% of the population of Pool being Polish – the other half being English, of course, the perpetrators or perpetrator may well have a point.”

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Cornishman dumps fiancée over false pasty making claims

A heartbroken Cornishman from Pool has dumped his fiancée, just three weeks before their marriage, after finding out that she has been lying to him about her pasty making skills.

Ruan Trewedna, 34, has been coming home from work every Saturday evening to be greeted by the smell of freshly baked pasties ever since the couple moved in together last March.

But last Saturday Mr Trewedna came home from work early to find his mother-in-law to be in their kitchen making the pasties, and his fiancée lying on the sofa watching classic JK.

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Cornish town given ‘ghetto status’ rating by tourism website

Camborne in Cornwall has been given a rare ‘ghetto status’ rating by tourism review website, holidaysuk.co.uk.

Reviewer Malcolm Lovell’s less than complimentary review focused on the town’s after hours entertainment, saying:

“Camborne’s night life was jaw dropping, reminiscent of a David Attenborough documentary. I witnessed a group of woman squatting down in the street, drinking and urinating at the same time”.

Lovell also had gripes about the guest house he stayed in:

“My stay at Park-An-Tansy’s Guest House was marred by filth.The wallpaper was hanging off, the bathtub had weeds growing in it, and I found a snake’s skin in my pillowcase.”

Website owner, Andy Vardon, 24, said: “we were obliged to review Camborne after one of our website users described the place as a ‘no-go zone’. The way I see it is, we have to give honest reviews.

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