Corbyn refuses to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ at 6-year-old’s birthday party

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn left dozens of children in tears on Sunday afternoon after refusing to sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to six-year-old boy, Peter Sampson. The incident happened at Peter’s grandparents’ house in Shropshire.

Peter’s granddad, Warren Carpenter, 68, said: “I’ve known Corbyn for years, but I only really invited him because my daughter wanted to meet him. If I realised he was going to be such an arsehole I wouldn’t have bothered.”

Warren’s daughter, Isabelle Sampson, 43, said: “Everything was fine, until we all sat around the table together. I noticed that Jeremy had started arguing with my husband about wearing a paper hat. So I ran in to get the cake. You know, as a distraction.

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Exposed: Jeremy Corbyn’s plans for universal domination!

The plans were discovered yesterday afternoon by retired teas maid Hilda Tilsbury, 78, from Dudley, in an e-mail from the Labour Party. Mrs Tilsbury opened the e-mail expecting it to be about her unanswered question to the party, regarding membership discounts for retired animal carers. Not Jeremy Corbyn’s plans for universal domination.

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