The branch manager of a telesales company in North London has come up with the idea of only employing mixed-race staff to confuse ‘impossible’ diversity quotas from the company’s head office in Birmingham.
Branch manager, Roger Bean, 43, said: “I was told by head office that the branch had to employ an equal amount of staff from different ethnic backgrounds, i.e. white/British, Eastern European, black, Asian, and Oriental.
“But it became too much to cope with. We started to take on staff because of their skin colour, not their skills. It was impossible. So I came up with the idea of only employing staff who are mixed-race, in the hope it would confuse head office quotas.”
Operations manager, Lloyd Flint, 53, said: “So far Roger’s idea has been a success. When the company exec’s came down last week they looked around at all the new telephone operatives and whispered to each other. They weren’t happy.
“I explained to them that we now had equal amounts of all ethnicities because all our telephone operatives are now mixed-race. The logic hit them like a knock-out punch from Floyd Mayweather.
“One exec wasn’t having it though. She got so het up about the idea that she tried telling me that one of our telephone operatives wasn’t mixed-race at all, but tanned. I got at the operative’s profile and made her look like a right twit.
“I actually think this is the future. Soon all companies will have a mixed-race only policy. The only downside was having to let a lot of our old staff go. They were good workers.”