Katy Wix injures finger on Planet of the Baboons set

Katy Wix was taken to hospital late last night after being injured on the set of Planet of the Baboons.

The Not Going Out star told reporters: “Oh, it was nothing. Just a scratch, really. My finger slipped on a razor sharp baboon tooth. Or rather, I slipped and my hand went into the baboon’s mouth and cut my finger. It could have been a lot worse when you think about it. I mean, imagine if my head went into its mouth.

“Most of the baboons are added later in the edit, so it’s not likely to happen again. Not unless I slip and injure myself on the green screen. Now, that would be embarrassing.”.

planet of the baboons watermarked

Sir Ridley Scott’s Planet of the Baboons is due to be released in cinemas this October.


Cameron calls for an end to Miliband’s “incessant” cheese eating

The Prime Minister has called for an end to Ed Miliband’s “incessant” cheese eating. The news came after the Labour leader told reporters that his New Year’s resolution is to eat more cheese.

Cameron said: “I’m fed up with Ed Miliband’s incessant cheese eating during House of Commons debates. As soon as the camera’s turned, he starts nibbling away on the stuff like some demented dairy squirrel. And now I hear that his New Year’s resolution is to eat more cheese. He’s clearly trying to wind me up.”

Ed Miliband responded: “I don’t know why my cheese eating concerns David Cameron, I really don’t. The way I see it is this: I take with me, into the House of Commons, a tiny handheld vacuum cleaner which I use to pick up any crumbs I’ve dropped. Because let’s face it, that’s the decent thing to do.

“Unlike David Cameron, who’s quite happy to leave canapé crumbs behind for someone else to pick up. That’s the fundamental difference between Labour and the Conservatives. If there’s a mess that needs picking up, the Labour Party will find be there to pick the mess up. It’s as simple as that.”